I don’t do public shows of distress (PSD). So when I fell in spectacular fashion on St Andrews Square in Edinburgh, I was mortified when passers🚶♂️ by rushed to my aid because, as I said before, I was howling 😭. I had only one thing on my mind; I wanted to get to Bon Vivant and have my lunch🥗 🍷!
My body (not to mention my hair and make-up), however had other ideas. No sooner had I clambered back to my feet 👏 when I passed out 🌀 and was flat on my back again. This led to a growing number of spectators 👀 to summon an ambulance🚑. Not me, I was against this from the start and quickly requested they cancel it. After all it was just a fall……..wasn’t it? 🌚
And in any case our bodies are pretty amazing. Firstly, despite the pain, my brain 🧠 status automatically slipped to organise. I was issuing instructions, handing my phone 📱 over to “ let the restaurant know we are not coming” and “ let my husband know?”. I noticed the latter caused quite a stir 🙀in the crowd; was this man with me not my husband?? I could see they were looking at each other trying to figure it out. (Although why I was even aware of these subtleties I have no idea!)
Secondly, however it was the physical reaction 🤢that led me to take the sensible decision and go to hospital. Shock was screaming at me very loudly through waves of nausea, violent shaking and spinning horizons. ( Not due to alcohol consumption, honestly 🍹). Not wanting to avail the Scottish Ambulance Service of their time for some silly 🤡 middle aged woman wearing the wrong footwear, the staff at Dishoom kindly summoned a taxi 🚕to take my colleague and I to the Royal Infirmary in Edinburgh. (Bet they thought he was my husband too 🤫).
Despite my best contortions and effort to describe this accident🙇♀️ and pain, and an x-ray suggesting nothing was broken, (although I felt I already knew that) the staff could not identify what ailed me. My left hamstring was on fire 🔥, I had excruciating pain when seated,💺 there was an agonising pain in both my pubic bone and the exterior of the left thigh between the hip and the knee. I was agitated because of the pain 🤦♀️and it was about 4 hours before they were able to get it under control. Only then could I allow them to touch my leg.
After much deliberation the Doctors advised me I was a bit of a conundrum (nice😷), they thought I’d likely have some bruising from this bad fall. They agreed I could go home if I was able to use the crutches on offer.
So I did; I went home, not the least bit clear on what was wrong. I did have information that the trauma team would be in touch over the next few days but had no real advice on what to do.
All fine, yep, but what about our trip to Harrogate on Monday????
